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Thursday, April 11, 2013

Being Content While Single : Truth

Hello Day Four! Wow! This week and this series is flying by!!
Today I want to talk about the importance of truth and truth tellers in your life.
As a single girl, we often hear lies. Lies can come from many places; whispers in your mind that you are not good enough to have a man, thoughts that God has forgotten about you, overheard conversations of church women saying there must be something wrong with you, feelings of hopelessness, the reminder that everyone is moving on while you just stay single and stuck, and of course, there are others. These are all lies.
You deserve to be loved. You are a treasure.You are wonderful.You are not forgotten. There is a plan.
Quiet the enemy's lies with truth from God's Word. "When there is a fight between your heart and your head, experience has taught me that the best thing to do is pick up your Bible and remind yourself of what God says. ... You need to return to the truth of God's Word that will last forever, not meditate on circumstances that will change and fade." (Undaunted Caine) God's Word is the only absolute truth. It is unchanging, unwavering, and always consistent. Be in the Word.
I also think it is very important to have 3 certain types of people in your life: a single friend, a friend that hasn't been married long, an an older friend that has been married for a while. They all need to point you back to the truth of God's Word, give sound advice that aligns with Truth, and won't be  afraid to call you out on stuff.
I love weddings, but I would be lying to you, if I told you I jumped up and down every time I received an invitation in the mail. Sometimes it is just plain hard to be excited for your friends when you feel like you are missing out. One of my best friends gave me great advice. She reminded me that none of these girls were marrying my man. He was still out there, waiting for me. Just because my friends are getting married and moving on, doesn't change anything from the plan God has for me. Instead of being sulky and bitter, I needed to choose to rejoice for my friends. I have clung to that piece of advice through a couple of wedding seasons, multiple babies being born, and friends buying houses. I am so grateful I have a friend who loves me enough to tell me in truth and love to get over myself. :)
I called my dad sobbing the other day. (I hate being an emotional girl. I am not even sure why I started crying that day, but I ended up crying because I am still single, and it doesn't feel fair, and its wedding season.) My dad is the kindest, wisest, and godliest man I know. He reminded me to wait on God's timing. I told him that it felt like it was never going to happen for me, I was going to be alone forever. He then told me, "Michelle, I really don't think so. God has a plan, and you are in it." What wise words. It stopped me mid sob. I needed that truth in that exact moment. God does have a plan, and I am in it. I am so thankful I have a dad who will tell me truth, even if I am an emotional basket case.
One of my best friends is just like me. We're two peas in a pod when it comes to being single, loving Jesus, and wanting adventure. We often have long talks, multiple nights a week. We talk about everything under the sun. Often the topic of marriage and our future husbands come up. We pray together, laugh together, and share dreams together. When she speaks truth into my life, it is sometimes softer than someone else's voice. She understands my struggles, because they are her struggles. She will let me talk all of my frustration out, then will ask a question that makes me really think, and points me back to truth. She doesn't fall for my excuses, and won't let me make them. She knows me too well. She doesn't beat around the bush, and I trust what she says, because I know she is actually saying it to both of us. It is such a blessing to be best friends and single together. I often pray that our husbands show up the same day, so the other is not left behind.
I also have a friend that has been married around 10 years. She gives me occasional glimpses into her marriage that are truthful. She doesn't pretty up situations, or act like marriage is always the easiest thing ever. I really appreciate her honesty that marriage is hard, but worth it. Years ago she told me that some mornings when she wakes up, she doesn't feel like loving her husband, but that love is a choice, not a feeling. It is shown in actions, not just by words. I am so thankful I have her giving me real, truthful wisdom.
Honestly, I didn't want to write this blog. I didn't want to share my struggles with people I don't even know. I wanted to avoid talking about how I cry far too much, how I often struggle with being content, and how I often believe the enemy's lies. I didn't want to appear desperate, emotional, or crazy. But I know this is what I was supposed to write today. I am a work in progress, and God is teaching me daily what it means to find contentment in Him. Today just seems like it is a bit more of a struggle. So, I pray something in here made sense, and that God can use it for His good, because I feel like a bit of a tired mess today.
Thank you for joining me on this journey! It really has been incredible.
Have a lovely afternoon.
Love, Michelle
Thursday's question: Who in your life brings you truth and points you back to the Bible?
GiveAWay Info: I will be giving a way a prize pack with some of my favorite goodies at the end of this series! There is only one prize. You can enter every day of the week by answering the question at the end of each daily blog. You can go back to previous days blogs for additional entries. Leave a comment with your name, city and state, and your answer to my question to be entered in this week's prize pack! I will announce the winner in a post on Saturday, April 13th, 2013. The winner will have to contact me via email at with their mailing address to receive their prize. Good luck! Prize Pack includes: The book Praying for Your Future Husband: Preparing Your Heart for His, Measuring cups and spoons, Nivea lip balm, Revlon nail polish, and a Bath and Body Work's lemon candle.
The Complete Series:

Don't forget to check out the other 15 blogs in this series about Intentional Living!
linking up with:Cornerstone Confessions


  1. I first want to say that what you wrote about yourself sounds so much like me. There have been many tears about still being single.

    My dad is the one that gives me great advice and guidance.

    Rochester, MN

    1. I am so glad you could relate Allison! We are so blessed to have wise fathers!

  2. Love that thought that "none of these girls are marrying your man." Weddings do the same thing to me. I really want to be happy for them, but there's always a bit of heartache lurking inside.

    I have a number of people who have spoken truth to me. Most are people in my church family. Some are peers and some are more like mentors. I'm also amazed at how the Lord has used authors and bloggers to speak truth to me and point me back to scripture.

    1. I have worn 9 bridesmaid dresses, and have helped plan a dozen more. Wedding season is a rough time for single girls. Praying for you (and me too!) as we enter another season of weddings and happiness for our friends.

  3. I have several ladies in my church who speak truth into my life that are in a small group bible study. A close friend who has said she would pray for me daily until my future husband came along. How sweet is that.

    Amber Olaffson is another she is an amazing friend who speaks truth and led me to your blog! Thank you!!!
    Kim B- Mt. Pleasant, NC

    1. That is so awesome to have a friend like that praying for you! You are a blessed woman!

      And Amber is such an awesome friend! I love having her around! :)

  4. I have A LOT of people who speak truth into my life, my MOM, my friends: Sara, Maria, Holly, Kim, YOU! Speakers: Joseph Prince & Christine Caine (so of course I LOVE that you quoted her!!)

    1. I didn't know if you were reading this series, but of course I thought of you when I quoted her!

  5. A good friend and former coworker who is single now but had been in an abusive marriage. I will always remember one of our first conversations, when she said that some marriages are so much worse than being single.
    Lorissa - Steinbach, MB

    1. One of my best friends has often reminded me that it is better to be single and alone than lonely in a marriage.

  6. Hi Michelle, my older sister is definitely one that points be back to the truth of God's Word. And I appreciate you sharing your struggles. I can certainly relate.

  7. Michelle, thank you SO MUCH for being willing to share your struggle on this blog! It has incredibly blessed me to know that I'm not alone in these feelings and also the truth that you're sharing is just a total comfort to my heart! My mom and dad are the most amazing parents and are always pouring Godly truth and wisdom into my heart! What a blessing good parents are!
    Bethany Jacksonville, FL

  8. I don't have anyone that I now trust with my pain of being single. Until very recently I had that friend you talked about that I shared the journey with. Everyone said we needed to meet our men at the same time but we didn't and that hurts hard.
    Thanks for sharing your struggles Michelle I pray that you won't have to wait as long as me. I hope that you are right that no one else is marrying my man - I do tell myself that, but I also know that we have human will and make their own decisions. Sorry to sound so negative. I mostly love my journey but I'm finding it really hard at the moment. Thanks for the encouragement you have provided to me these 5 days. I will continue to refute the lies by staying close to God.