Dear married friends,

I have a handful of amazing girlfriends that are wives, mamas, and some of my biggest cheerleaders. 

In a world full of lists and how tos of what we should do better, I just wanted to take a minute to praise them for what they are already doing so well. 

It is hard some days to be the only awkward, single friend in a sea of married people. Trust me, I know. But my friends have done such an amazing job of loving me well, and I think that's really rare. So today, I want to celebrate them. 

Dear married friend, 

I know our seasons of life are vastly different right now, but I just had a few things I wanted to share with you. 

I love you so much, and I am so thankful for you. 

Thank you for talking about your marriage openly and honestly. It is good for my fairy tale loving heart to hear that marriage is hard sometimes, there is compromise needed, and that a happily ever after takes real work. 

Thank you for inviting me over for dinner. Sometimes being single is amazing, and I eat a bowl of cereal for dinner, while watching Netflix, and not wearing pants. But often, I would just love to sit down to a home cooked meal with a table full of people that are in fact, wearing pants. Cooking for one is something I'm not a huge fan of. 

Thank you for showing me the real messes in your house. I love the Instagram ready and Pinterest perfect parts, but it really means a lot that you allow me to see the undone reality. It helps me feel a little bit more normal to know I'm not the only one that struggles with laundry and dishes. 

Thank you for not glamorizing my singleness, and keeping me in line about not glamourizing married life. Neither are perfect or magical all of the time. You have shown me that with your transparency, and honest views into your life. 

Thank you for including me. Sometimes just the offer to be apart of something means everything in the world. I appreciate not being excluded just because it might be awkward, but instead inviting me, and letting me choose for myself. 

Thank you for including me on lunch/play dates. I would love to have my own babies right now, but since that isn't happening, I really do love to hang out with yours, and watch them go down the slide 47 times. It really does make my heart smile. 

Thank you for letting me borrow your babes. Some days the baby fever is overwhelming, and just taking your kids to lunch, the movies, or out for ice cream helps fill that void. Also, thanks for trusting me to steal them for a few hours. 

Thank you for not making my singleness a huge deal. I love that you're not constantly trying to set me up, or making me feel like I'm incomplete because I haven't met that sweet man yet. 

Thank you for being my sounding board on what to wear for a date, and the sanity I need when I replay every thing over and over after the fact. (Hello. Maybe don't tell a guy, "I'm so glad you're not a murderer!" 103 times while at dinner... I know that now because of you, thanks.)

Thank you for celebrating my big moments, and crying with me during my rough seasons. It really does mean so much that you push pause on your busy life to make mine a little less lonely. 

Thank you for not marrying a loser, and for letting me see that husbands can actually be pretty cool. I love getting little glimpses of what really good, godly men look like. It helps me see what is truly important in a man, and I hold those qualities and tidbits in my mind ready for when I meet a guy. 

Thank you for calling and texting me for normal reasons, other than just needing a babysitter. I would love to watch your kids, but I also would love to know that our friendship isn't based on just that.

Thank you for cheering me on. Because of you, I know the best is yet to come, but this season right now is pretty amazing too. I will cherish every night that I can sleep in the middle of the bed alone, without a baby crying to wake me up. 

Thank you for going before me, so I can learn from you. I love the wisdom you impart, and I am excited for the day when I can use it. You are really smart, and the good and not so good in your life have taught me so much. Your advice is pure gold, and is often still rumbling around my brain years later. 

Thank you for praying for me when there just aren't any words left to say. Taking me to Jesus when I can't seem to get off the floor is one of the best things you can do, and you do it so well. 

Thank you for being you, and letting me be me. I love that you share your life and family so openly. You are a treasure. And I am one lucky and blessed girl. 

Love you. So much. 

M 

 

The night I delivered a baby.

At the end of the summer, four of us set out to love some girls on the streets of Pontiac. We brought hygiene kits, and lunch bags consistently every Tuesday night. We had a heart for the prostitutes and the homeless. 

On our first night, we encountered a young girl, K. She was hungry, homeless, and pregnant. 

Quickly we realized our heart in this season was for K. We walked beside her, trying to show her love. We prayed with her, fed her, had hard conversations with her, and tried to just be her friends. 

Because life on the street is hard, and so many basic needs are not taken care of, she wasn't exactly sure when she was due. She was told mid August, beginning of September, and then later told mid November. 

We had no idea what we were doing, but we kept walking along side her, and showing the love of Jesus. 

On a Wednesday afternoon, I received a frantic call that I needed to meet K at the hospital. I had just woken up from a nap, and was so confused. The night before, some people on the street told us they didn't even think she was pregnant, and K herself told us that the clinic told her that she was only 7 months along.

Since my car is dead, I called and called and called, until I could get a ride to the hospital. 27 phone calls later, my neighbor was on her way. 

I sobbed almost uncontrollably the whole way to the hospital. Helllllo. I've never had a baby. I had no idea how to help her out. I wasn't supposed to be going alone. This isn't how it was supposed to happen. 

But my neighbor calmed me down. She told me I could keep crying until I walked into the hospital doors, but then I had to be a pillar of strength. K was all alone, and she needed me not to freak out. We prayed really big prayers, and I walked in, telling myself over and over that I could do hard things. 

I got up to the labor and delivery floor pretty easily. And then I stood at the nurses' station while trying to explain that I thought I was going to be K's person for the night, because I could do hard things. They looked at me like I had lost my mind. I probably had. They ended up asking if I meant I was going to be her birth coach. Ha ha. Um yeah, that's what I meant to say... 

So I walked into the room I was directed to. It was dark with all the lights off, and sitting in a bed all alone was K. She looked so scared. 

A contraction was coming on, so I ran over to hold her hand, but she wasn't really interested. So I sat and prayed. 

We chatted a tiny bit in between contractions, and by God's grace, within minutes she was gripping my hand with superhuman strength. 

The nurse came in to check on us, and K thought her water had broke. So a doctor was called in. She checked her, and she was really moving along. 

In no time at all, it was time for a baby to be born. There wasn't time for an epidural or IV pain meds, it was just time. 

So I held her hand while she squeezed it in pain. I held her leg back, and counted for her as she pushed. I told her over and over, "You can do hard things!" while trying to convince myself of the same thing. 

And less than an hour after I first walked into that room, the tiny cries of new life filled the air. 

He was perfect. 

The doctor turned to me and asked if I wanted to cut the umbilical cord. Oh what an honor. So I did. 

They plopped him on his mama's chest, and I just stood there, in this sacred moment that God had ordained for me to be apart of. 

That month, I was only home 6 days. I had been in Texas and Arizona for weeks before, and had a family trip just two days after this. Other team members were busy and randomly out of town. 

This moment was for me. Just for me. 

Within a few moments, she handed him to me, and I snuggled him close, and prayed over him. I helped him get wrapped up in blankets for the first time, and put on his little hat. 

I held him for a bit while everything sunk in. I just had the honor of helping deliver a baby. 

What is my life?! 

I gave him back go his mama, and stepped outside. I slid down to the ground, and started crying the really big tears. 

Oh that Jesus would go before, and give me this moment. Grace upon grace. Oh what a night. What a sacred and beautiful moment to be apart of. To step in and be someone's person, when they were completely alone. Oh what an honor. 

A nurse came over to me to make sure I was okay. I couldn't stop gushing about what an amazing moment I just was apart of. She gave me apple juice, and told me to go sit in the waiting room for a bit. I was clearly getting a reputation with the nurses. 

I walked back in to her room a few moments later, thankful to Jesus for these moments, and thankful to my amazing mascara for keeping my sobbing fit a secret. 

We chatted, I held him again, and a couple of visitors arrived. 

I helped be apart of choosing his name, and I just prayed over him with such a ferver in my bones. Jesus, use this little babe. Stop the cycle of brokenness. Go before him, and draw him to You. 

I went home a little bit later, thankful for my bed after all of that excitement.

Now weeks later, I am still in awe of that night. Oh that Jesus would go before, and let me partake of such a sacred moment. What an honor. 

Following Jesus is not for the faint of heart. It's wild, crazy, and full of adventure. 

These last few months on the streets have taught me so much. I am so thankful for every sandwich we have given out, every smile we have shared, every hand we have held, and every person we were able to just share Jesus with. 

Oh what an honor to love people, do good, and share Jesus. 

It's not a bad life. 

M. 

Race day is quickly approaching! Can you believe it?!

I have begun to pack my socks, my shoes, and about 12 different wardrobe options in case the weather should change. (Of course when the race begins, it will be 34°, so that will keep us on our toes.)

I have bought Epsom salt in abundance for post race recovery baths, I made sure I had bottles of Motrin, and cases of water in the fridge. 

I have located my passport, and figured out what snackage I'm packing for during the race. 

You guys, this is really happening. 

41 weeks ago I started walking 10 miles a week. And then I got this crazy idea in my head to just do 13.1 all at once. So 28 weeks ago, I officially signed up for the Detroit half marathon. It was about that same time one of my best friends, Tina, and I made a pinky promise to do the race together. 

So, now that it's almost here, I'm going to ask something of you. 

Could you pray for us? 

I would love to know that someone is praying for us, every mile of the way. 

Pre race:

Mile 1:

Mile2:

Mile 3:

Mile 4:

Mile 5:

Mile 6:

Mile 7:

Mile 8:

Mile 9:

Mile 10:

Mile 11:

Mile 12:

Mile 13:

Mile .1:

Post race: 

You can comment on Facebook, or here on the blog to sign up for a mile. 

Thanks for all of your love and support already. 

M. 

1st Annual Scarf Exchange

Recently a couple of friends threw a scarf exchange party.   

I was pumped. It's fall, the perfect weather for scarves. I own more than any girl should own. But I always want new ones. I am also living la vida broka, so there isn't money for new scarves. And I love girls' nights. 

So invitations went out, and planning began. 

It was decided that every girl could bring one or two scarves (wrapped), and that we would exchange White Elephant style. Each girl was also asked to bring a drink, dessert, or an appetizer. 

We weren't sure how many scarves we would have, so we made 30 slips of paper, and later pulled out the last four, when we knew we had 26. 

Meg made these AMAZING cinnamon sugar mini doughnuts. Hello fall, you are welcome here. 

Once everyone arrived, we had plenty of delicious food! 

After snacking and catching up, we sat in a circle, and I explained the rules. 

We had papers numbered 1-26 in a bucket. We passed the bucket around, and if you brought 2 scarves, you picked two numbers. If you only brought one scarf, you only picked one number. 

Number 1 went first, then 2, and 3, etc. When it was your turn, you were allowed to steal any scarf that had already been opened, or take a new scarf from the pile. 

A scarf was allowed to be stolen two times, but never in the same round. Once it was stolen twice, it was dead, and no longer in play. 

Number 1 went first, but also last in our game. She was allowed to pick from any of the in play scarves, the last unwrapped scarf, or keep what she had. If she took from someone else, and all scarves were unwrapped, she just traded, and the game was over. 

It was a fantastic (and free) evening full of laughter, good food, and also cute new scarves. 

At the end of the scarf party, we celebrated one of our best girls on the last evening of her 20's. She was so surprised. 

Happy 30th, Si! 

We love scarves! 

First annual scarf exchange was a success! 

I encourage y'all to try out this fabulous and free night with girlfriends! And if scarves aren't your thing, try accessories, or coffee mugs. 

Love, M. 

Hot chocolate for all!

Hot chocolate for all!

Last year for Halloween, I wanted to do something special. I had been wrestling with how Jesus tells us to love our neighbors, and at the time, I didn't even really know my neighbors. 

I'm convinced that Halloween must be one of the best nights to love your neighbors, because everyone is out in the neighborhood. 

I currently live in Michigan, where we often celebrate Halloween with snow pants under costumes. Michigan is a temperamental kinda gal, and we never really know what weather we may get. 

Well last year the forecast was looking chilly, blustery, snowy, and wet. 

So I decided to make a hot chocolate stand for all the parents and trick or treaters to warm up. 

I used my favorite ikea cart, and placed a large glass dispenser of hot chocolate, whipped cream, marshmallows, and a cute sign on the top shelf. In the middle, I stocked it with foam cups, and at the bottom, I just had cute tea lights in mason jars. 

I added a large chalkboard sign, and of course some pumpkin decorations. 

I grabbed a chair (that matched, naturally), but once the night got rolling, I was too busy to sit. 

I had a large pot on the stove warming up for the second batch, so I wouldn't run out. 

It was so cold, I had a tank top, thermal long sleeve, flannel button up, and a puffy vest on. And probably should've had more on. Seriously. 

When the night was over, I gave out 87 cups of hot chocolate, which included 3.5 gallons of cocoa, 2 cans of whipped cream, and an extra large bag of marshmallows. I also have out 6 large bags of candy. 

What an incredible night to just love my sweet lil community. 

I'm excited for this year! I think I'm going to do something similar. 💛

How can you love your neighbors? 

Love, M. 

The Purposeful Planner

The Purposeful Planner.

I am not type A. I do not have my life organized just so, and perfectly planned. That's just not me. 

I think that's why I have always loved planners. With just a little effort, I could be organized. I've learned that a good planner will do most of the hard work for you, you just need to fill in the details. 

I have been using random planners over the years, and I always have complaints. The last planner I bought took me 3 stores, and almost 5 hours to settle on. 

Why are they so ugly? Why aren't they laid out in a way that makes sense? Ugh. 

About seven months ago, I was chosen to be apart of Jen Hatmaker's book launch team for "For the Love". On that team were 495 other amazingly smart, creative, and wonderful women. (And 4 men) 

One of the girls I connected with quickly is a total babe from Southern California. Her name is Corie Clark, and she makes the Purposeful Planner. 

Once I began following her on social media, I was in love. Her planners are gorgeous and they actually make sense with the way my brain works. 

When I flew to Texas for our book's launch party, Corie and I, along with 18 other girls stayed in a house together. 

Corie surprised us all with beautiful planners. 

I love mine so much. It comes everywhere with me. 

{lunch with mama}

{jet setting 'round the world} 

{hanging with my besties}  

{glasses, lipstick, and matching planners} 

Some of my favorite things include pages for your monthly budget, your monthly menu, a monthly master task list for cleaning your house, and a monthly dreams and goals page. 

I have the weekly planner, which I prefer. I like to see the entire week all laid out together. 

Corie's design features a place to check off that you're drinking enough water, a brain dump spot, and a spot to write down prayer requests and praises. 

There are sections dedicated to helping you get to your ten year goals. And there is a page ready for your bucket list. That is where I wrote out my 30 before 30 busket list. 

Seriously, I love this planner so much and have used it every day since I received it. 

If you would like to check it out for yourself, head over to :

http://corieclarkshop.com

@purposefulplanner on Instagram 

Corie's new line will be out soon! Those planners will run Jan-Dec of 2016. There are a few different styles, and products. So be sure to check it out. 

And if you want to read one of my favorite blog posts, be sure to hop over here ... http://corieclark.com/fangirl-your-friends/

M. 

October 12th.

I had debated sharing about this day, but sometimes it's nice to get it all out there, and just know that you're not alone. 

October 12th was the day that I decided a decade ago, that I would get married on. If you have experienced a Michigan mid October day, you would know, there is nothing better. So when the date year after year, was amazingly colorful, warm but crisp, and bright with possibility, I looked at a calendar, and saw it landed on a Saturday in my mid twenties. It was the perfect plan. 

Except the most important part of that plan hadn't shown up yet. I grew anxious in waiting, while excited to see how it would all play out. After all, I was following Jesus, and He could give me this desire of my heart. This wasn't too big for Him. My parents met and were married within 3 months. They've been married for over 30 years, so I wasn't too worried about time, it was possible. 

But then it didn't happen. Time passed. And I was still alone. 

I allowed a seed of bitterness to begin to have hold of my heart. 

And then, a close family friend, that I had grown up with, passed away from a car accident on October 12th, three years ago. Our sweet Ariel Rose. She was just 21. 

I know she's in Heaven. She's been in the presence of Jesus for the last thousand days. Oh and for that, I'm slightly jealous. She is with Jesus. 

But my heart could not handle all of this. I grew angry with God. Why did He take Ar? And why on my favorite day of the year? Honestly it was hard to trust in a God that didn't seem to have my best interest at heart. 

Grief is a really messy thing. Those were really hard days, and even harder nights. 

But time began to pass, and Jesus, the lover of my soul, began to draw me close, once again. 

The last handful of years, I have a relationship with Jesus that I didn't even know was possible. It has been full of really hard days, but I think that is why my faith has grown so deep. 

I can stand without a husband by my side, strong and ready for whatever is next. I am no longer bound by my singleness. 

I can live life well, knowing I don't understand so much, but I know the One that knows it all. I am no longer bound by my grief. 

This week I am waiting to hear if I will be given an interview for a job I want very much. I am begging God for favor, but I am trying to remind myself that He is in control, and has a plan, no matter the outcome. 

At the end of this week, I am running (and walking) a half marathon. For whatever reason, my body is freaking out. (Is this normal?) I have an upset stomach, and cannot seem to sleep well. I am terrified I won't finish. 13.1 miles is no easy task. So I am trying to remind myself of my training, and that I can do hard things, because Jesus goes before me. 

I'm not trying to wrap everything up in a nice little bow. Because that would be so fake. But I am in a better place than I expected to be. The nightmares still come, the house is still a mess, but after walking this season of so many unknowns, my faith is stronger, and I don't feel so wobbly. 

So today. I purposely didn't put anything on the books. I knew that I needed time and space to feel all the feels, and work out whatever I needed to. 

I'm planning on finishing up organizing my closet. I need to get a few mile run in. I might eat some cold leftover pizza. I'll probably cry a lot. (I already have, why stop now...) I intend on sitting and reading God's Word. 

I don't want today to be my dark day any longer. I don't know how to get there, but I think I'm making progress in the right direction. 

I'm thankful for a Savior that is writing my story. Because if I was in charge of writing it, it would be beautiful and easy. But I am learning that the hard and ugly days produce something the others cannot. 

I'm thankful for the woman I have become because of trials. She is strong, she is resilient, she has empathy for others, she can do hard things, and she knows Who fights for her. 

M. 

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2013/08/my-date-his-plan.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2015/10/one-week-til-131-and-totally-freaking.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/10/blog-post.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/10/it-only-jesus.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/10/dark-days.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/11/raw-ugly-messy-real-transparent.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/11/i-went-to-cemetery.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/11/he-is-here.html?m=1

http://adventureintheunknown.blogspot.com/2012/12/cemetery-love-sleep.html?m=1